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Thriving
During The Holidays—with children
The
holidays are a time to be with friends and
family and to experience the joy of shared
hope. But many times, the holidays also
bring too much hurrying and not enough family
time. Most of us have learned to manage
the stress the befalls most adults, yet
we overlook the added stress that is put
onto children who are ill-equipped to handle
quick transitions, broken routines, greater
expectations and less time with parents.
The following ideas may help you and your
children to thrive during the holidays.
Preserve Routines and Relationships
- Be
sensitive to the changes that occur
in a child’s world when family and
friends descend upon your home and
make it a Bed & Breakfast for the
holidays. If a child is giving up
their room for a guest to use, transfer
the child’s favorite things to the
temporary room to make it feel extra
comfy.
- Perhaps
allowing a special treat, like falling
asleep or taking a nap in Mom and
Dad’s bed, will help make the holidays
special to a young child.
- Find
time to have a designated time with
your child, even in the midst of
the busy holiday season. Taking
time out to read a story to cousins
during an adult party can fill a
child’s love tank very quickly.
- Even
away from home, establish routines.
Even more than adults, children
find routines and repetition comforting.
It helps them to know that certain
things happen the same way each
time. Establishing routines for
doings things together also makes
it less likely that your child will
misbehave. Keep the morning and
evening routines the same whenever
possible.
- Create
a job for each child and a way for
them to contribute to the holiday
dinner. One can make placemats for
a special breakfast, one can make
the rolls and another can decorate
the table or light the candles.
- Respect
your child’s wishes not to kiss
or hug a relative. Children should
be polite; role playing how to greet
guests and say goodbye helps. Sometimes
saying goodbye to a grandparent
a few hours before they (or you)
actually go helps children feel
more comfortable—especially when
they are very sad to see a special
person leave.
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Prepare
for Traveling
- Feed
your children before leaving the
house. Many times the schedule for
dinner at someone else’s house will
leave your children very hungry
and grumpy.
- If
you are traveling or visiting a
friend’s home for dinner, take a
favorite food or snack. Take sippy
cups and non-messy snacks like grapes.
If you have a preschooler, show
him or her where to find the bathroom.
- Prepare
your child for being a guest and
for traveling. Children need to
know what to expect in a home with
different rules.
- Pack
craft activities for everyone to
work on while visiting. Paper Bag
Puppets, Paper Woven Placemats,
and God’s eyes are easy to bring
along.
- Keep
your children’s bedtimes—even out
of town. A tired child is rarely
a joy to be around.
- Consider
a moratorium on the manners lessons
during holidays. Your meal will
be much more pleasant for the children
and adults. Children don’t enjoy
being criticized in public.
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By
Jenny Beaumont, Swan Learning Center, www.swanlearningcenter.com
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